7-10-17) Suicidal Blade

Suicidal blade


Dont look, don’t see, dont feel,

as the blade feels me.

I can’t resist the feel of it open my wrist.

I close my eyes, to my surprise,

how i can even feel the life of my soul still beating inside.

Talking  to the walls, like they can

even hear me

at all, 

it’s the only thing

that prevents my fall.

I hear you calling me, asking me 

to push that suicidal blade


your voice echos in

my ears, so much

light and love , it brings me to tears,

my heart finally realizes

there is no in

the blade , 

changing my mind,

I throw the blade away. 

I reopen my eyes,

now i want is 




2-14-17) Pain ?


“Pain ?”


This word Pain.

what is it ?.

Is it a thorn ?.

Is it the past ?.

something worn ?.

No, its life’s reality, that

almost said good-bye,

as I fought for my last breath its finality and

yet temporary death.

Did I see a light ?. was it through

my minds window ?.

should I lie ?.

NO !.

for it was not long enough for me

to know.

so now I continue

to live in this life’s


holding this unknown book of truth

yet to be told.

some day I will know .


3-31-16) Lights Out



Light’s Out.


Lights out, going dark,

feeling the signs of death coming over me.

yet at the same time, memories

of the light are

too far from my own



Visions of my awakening, feeling

the love of the one

who has not



his love surrounding me,

sending me back,

giving me

another chance at life, to look further at life’s

continuing glance as I dance

in life’s spiral dance.

Fleeting, flying, seeing into my own


of my soul.

showing me where i now should


In time I will know.



normally i don’t give the meaning behind my poems.

but on this one i will. on march 12th-2016, early Saturday morning, i had a sever Asthma attack, all’s i remember is telling my man to call 911 and saying “god please don’t let me die”as i black out and fainted.

the ambulance and firetruck, came to our door in 2 minutes, and maybe worked on me for 15 minutes or less, you see when they came, i was dead, they saved my life that morning, if it was not for them and all the people at the hospital, this little poem would not exist.

i’m so damn glad i’m alive, now i’m on the medicine i need to be on, i hope my health, my Asthma continue’s to get better.

Asthma is no joke, it came back like a bad dream. now i have to learn all over again to deal with it .


11-19-14) “wintry cry”

“Wintry Cry”


sing me a


sing me a lullaby,

pierce my heart with your deadly


sing me to sleep in the dead of

winter ,

i want your words to feel like a


open my eyes like wintry  tears of snow

flake glitter.



5-8-12) ” In my shadow “

” In my shadow “

in my shadow , i feel so dark .

looking in my mirror i see that

my eyes have lost their spark.

i stand here in the streets of my

own past, stuck here , hoping that

my shadowed thoughts wont last.

i ask myself why i feel this way

as i watch the tree’s dance and sway.

trying so hard to show me the way ,

i smile as if i feel their vibration, like

a song , a melody with out ryme or

reason .

i look deep inside , looking for my

wings of flight pushing away all

this false reason.

the answer is right there for the

taking , my soul singing in delite

, as i take my first flight towards

all that i have not forsaken.

which is my birth right as i walk out

of the shadow away from my past,

never looking back.

as i look into the light .

my freedom is my right .

my wisdom is my third sight.

as i claim what is mine,

that of which is my birthright .



my first , its lame, very interesting

as i learn this site, i figured out the i can register another blog, it has its own link, but its on one account, how cool. this blog i will put things like poetry, as i grow into this i might change everything up a bit.